A Flop and a Leap of Faith

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Over the Bar

You ever watch the High Jump during the Olympics or on television during one of the rare occasions they show track and field events? I think the competition is somewhat cool, probably at least partly because I can’t do it very well. I have never been a very good jumper either horizontally or vertically. The idea is that the athlete approaches a horizontal bar and attempts to leap over it without knocking the bar down. Each time they raise the bar a little higher. Naturally, whoever jumps the highest wins.

The first recorded High Jump event was in the 19th century in Scotland. They would basically just scissors-kick over the bar. That advanced to running up to the bar and then throwing the one leg over and then the other. Shortly after people innovated with “roll” techniques where they would almost literally roll their body over the bar. For protection, there would be a sawdust pit on the other side of the bar for a landing area.

Changing the Landscape

The real innovation happened in 1968 when Dick Fosbury of Oregon State University employed a totally different technique. By this time, the saw dust pit gave way to a cushioned landing area. Fosbury would run up on the bar at an angle and the thrust himself backwards over the bar, head first, and complete the jump by “flopping” his legs over and landing on his back. Fosbury used this technique to win the Gold Medal in the 1968 Olympics. Today, almost every high jumper uses the “Fosbury Flop” technique. The current record, according to Reference.com, is 8 feet and one-half inch set by Javier Sotomayor from Cuba.

Leap of Faith

The reason I mention this is an observation made about the flop technique. If you were to do that and land on hard ground or even in the old saw dust pits, you would likely break your neck. In other words, if the cushion wasn’t there and you landed, you would be in a whole lot of trouble. Broken bones, skull and brain damage would be highly probable. But the flopper, because of the technique, doesn’t get to see the landing area as they are jumping; they simply have faith that it is there and that they will land in the right spot. It is a LEAP OF FAITH in their ability to complete the jump.

The high jumper makes this leap of faith because they believe in their skills, their training, their visualization, and their execution to make the jump without getting injured. He TRUSTS himself to do what he has prepared and trained to do. He doesn’t wonder if any kind of outside force is going to get in the way, he trusts his body and his training to get the job done. He doesn’t create excuses for why he can’t jump today, he just goes and gets the job done.

Even though he BELIEVES he will be successful every time he jumps, he actually doesn’t KNOW until it is over whether he has been successful or not. So, the high jumper has FAITH in his ability to perform every time; even when he is unsuccessful or bettered by others. At no point does he give up because the weather got in his way, or the bar was mounted incorrectly, or there are others competing that are more athletic or talented. He ignores all outside factors and simply has FAITH in his skills and training and performs the best he can.

Flopping Our Way to Success

You and I may not be jumping over a bar 8 foot of the ground, (I already mentioned I am a terrible jumper), but we face hurdles and walls as we pursue our goals and dreams. To overcome those hurdles and complete our mission successfully, we have to have FAITH in our abilities, prepare ourselves for success, expect success, and then success will come. We won’t really be able to see the landing area until we are up and over the bar, and sometimes not until we land. But the landing area is there and we have believe we will clear the hurdles and land successfully. That is our LEAP OF FAITH.

What’s keeping you from making that LEAP OF FAITH? What is argument you give yourself? Is it true? It is always true? How can you prepare yourself more effectively to take a Leap of Faith? How can you reinforce your beliefs everyday to keep that faith alive?

Action Plan

Target an area where you feel like you are not where you want to be. Where do you want to be? What do you think is holding you back from reaching that goal?
Apply a little realism. Are the things you THINK are holding you back real or imagined? Are they simply excuses? It’s time to be brutally honest with yourself. Yeah, you know the real answer!
Read or listen to a daily affirmation to keep a positive mindset. Reading it out loud is best because the most important words you hear are the ones you say to yourself. This is not (necessarily) New Age stuff; it is real and valid. Zig Ziglar, Norman Vincent Peale, and others have promoted positive affirmations as a way of changing your mindset and your life. Here’s a good one from Hal Elrod or you can get one from Zig. I prefer the Ziglar version, although it is a little longer.
Engage in your daily personal growth to prepare yourself for success. Remember, be a 1%er.

“You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win.”

Zig Ziglar

The Myth of Doing It All

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Having It All Together … Right!

You can probably think back and remember someone who seemed to always have it together. They were involved in everything and always seemed to excel at everything they did. They never slowed down; they served on committees, organized events, raised 55 children and spent quality time with each of them, worked two full-time jobs, volunteered at the local shelter, raised money to fight some disease, wrote 100 books, and has the happiest spouse in the world. They seem to have it all and have it all together.

In reality, there are parts of their lives that are neglected. I exaggerated the description above intentionally because that’s what we often do when we think about those high achieving types. We draw a picture of what we think someone is like and we enhance it. We make them bigger than they are. Then we compare ourselves to them, imaging that they have everything in life and it’s perfect while our lives are hollow shells full of meaningless events and a cesspool of problems. It’s unfair!

Reality is Not Perfection

It’s also unreal. The truth is that people who seem to have it together are not living perfect lives. They may be accomplishing more than we are right now, but that’s not because they have it all together. It’s not because they are necessarily more talented than we are; in fact, often they may be less talented. And they have problems too, they just don’t share them around as much as some others do.

But what they really have that helps them succeed is an good understanding and effective application of the Law of Sacrifice. You must give up to go up. You have to let go of some things in order to have other better things.

That’s a scary prospect for many of us and perhaps even a little depressing. When we think about sacrifice or giving up, we picture big things. We can become a CEO but our family life is non-existent. Again, it’s that penchant for exaggeration. And it’s also good old resistance finding other reasons to keep us from making any changes.

Simplicity in Sacrifice

Sacrifice is actually pretty simple. You actually look at giving up lesser things in order to get greater things. You sacrifice a couple hours of television time every day in order to read a personal growth book. You sacrifice a few free evenings each week to work on a master’s degree. When you learn to sacrifice, what you are really doing is simply learning to

Say No to the Good So You Can Say Yes to the Best

My father excelled in the credit union business during his career. He was President and CEO of several credit unions over the span of many years and also was a high demand consultant to credit unions nationwide for many years after that. To get there, he had to spend long hours working, gave up evenings to earn a GED and then a degree. Yet, he was never an absentee husband or father. He coached Drum Corps and Little League. He took us on trips. He went to dance recitals for my sister. He had to sacrifice to reach the level he achieved, but the sacrifices were to give up lesser things to get those greater things. He did not give up one great thing to achieve another.

Yes, you have to sacrifice to get where you want to go. But the good news is that the choice is yours.

Action Plan

What little things are you willing to give up to reach your goals?
What systems can you put into place to make sure you don’t give up the wrong things?

The Law You Can’t Break – The Law of Sacrifice

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Don’t Tell Me What to Sacrifice

I have a problem. It has always been with me, sometimes helping me and sometimes haunting me. I just don’t like having someone tell me I can’t have it or can’t do it. For example, I have read a lot of blogs and columns about being an entrepreneur. In a good deal of them, they paint a less than rosy picture. They often talk about how you can’t have it all, something has to give. Andrew Dumont even says you need to acknowledge that there is no such thing as work-life balance for an entrepreneur. Stories abound with businessmen (and women) about missed recitals, soccer matches, anniversaries, and other things. So, forget all about work-life balance.

I don’t buy it. No, I refuse to buy it. The passion of many entrepreneurs is the same; they do something because people said they couldn’t do it. That’s my attitude. Tell me I can’t have balance and succeed? Watch me!

The Law of Sacrifice Always Applies

To be sure, there are things you (and I) will have to give up. Some are daily things, such as extended television time, browsing the Internet, cocktail hour, and a good deal of free time. That’s called the Law of Sacrifice and you cannot avoid it. If you want to have any level of success, whether it is running a small business, moving up the corporate ladder, becoming a top sports athlete, or a celebrity; you will have to sacrifice things to get there. As John Maxwell says

You have to give up to go up!

What sacrifices you make is the decision you must face and I recommend you face it early. Being defiant or rebellious can be a wonderful thing and has helped many an entrepreneur move forward. But the ones who last and build a legacy are the ones who know when to make smart decisions and when to ask for help. And they know to give up things that are trivial or not as important to gain things that are important.

There are good kinds of sacrifice in this. Often, leaders are required to make sacrifices to lead people effectively. One of the biggest that a leader must make is putting others first. Leaders must sacrifice the limelight and yield it to their team. Entrepreneurs must sacrifice being right most of the time to be very wrong most of the time. They must sacrifice their ego because they will fail again and again until little things happen and build and success is achieved. Sacrifice can have very positive outcomes, when you make the right choices on what to sacrifice.

Start right away to devise your strategy for fulfilling the Law of Sacrifice, because one way or another you will have to obey the law. Just make sure it’s your choice what you give up.

Mindset – Handling Fear Part II

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Ripping the Shirt Off of Fear

It’s July 10, 1999 and in Pasadena, California Team USA and China are battling for the Women’s World Cup Soccer Championship in the Rose Bowl. This is the largest attended women’s sports event in history. At the end of regulation play, the score is tied and it goes to overtime. In overtime, Brandi Chastain intently lines up for a penalty kick. She sets herself, runs up to the ball, and launches it into the upper right corner of the goal to score and in her now famous celebration pulls her shirt off in mid-field. A win and championship for Team USA!

Tell me, what do you think was going through her mind? Was Brandi thinking about how she was going to blow it?

Pointing to Success

Going back further, in one of the greatest sports moments of all time, George Herman “Babe” Ruth of the New York Yankees steps up to home plate in the fifth inning of Game 3 of the 1932 World Series. The score is tied 5-5 and the Chicago Cubs players on the bench have been riding the Babe mercilessly. As Ruth steps to the plate, he makes a gesture that many believe has him pointing to the center field wall after taking strike one from the pitcher, seemingly declaring his intention. He did it again after strike two. On the next pitch, the Babe mightily smacked the ball deep into center field and over the fence for a home run! It is estimated the ball traveled 490 feet! The Yankees went on to win the World Series in a four-game sweep.

Whether you believe the intent of the gesture or not, do you believe for one minute that Babe Ruth, who not only held the record for homeruns but also for strikeouts, focused on what would happen if he didn’t deliver?

The difference in success and failure is often a matter of how we handle our fears. Dr. Heidi Halvorson, co-author of the book Focus: Use Different Ways of Seeing The World For Success and Influence, says that handling that fear effectively is often a matter of mindset. It’s all about where we focus our attention. According to Dr. Halvorson, we have a choice of one of two mindsets when faced with accomplishing a goal or meeting a deadline or performing during a critical moment. We can have a what she calls a Prevention Focus; where we concentrate on the negative aspects of the situation. The concentration is on NOT messing up. We do this in our daily lives and with others. When a parent tells a child who wants to help set the table,

“Okay, but this is our best dinnerware, don’t drop it!”

With instructions like that, you might as well trip the kid yourself. Or a manager tells an employee,

“it is very important that you don’t blow this account.“

Best example I can think of is the story Zig Ziglar tells of the 1982 football playoffs between the Dallas Cowboys and the San Francisco 49ers. With Dallas ahead and less than a minute left on the clock, Dallas implemented the Prevent Defense. Joe Montana dropped back and threw a pass deep into the end zone that appeared to be sailing for out of bounds when Dwight Clark jumped up and made a fingertip catch for San Francisco to win the game. Later, someone asked Cowboys owner Tex Schramm about what made the difference and he said,

“The Dallas Cowboys were determined NOT TO LOSE the game. The 49ers were determined to WIN the game and that made the difference!”

So prevention focus centers on trying not to lose the game.

The opposite then is Promotion Focus. In this mindset, you are focused on what you have to gain when you are successful. “If I complete this project on time, our company will collect a big bonus from our customer.” Promotion Focus centers on the win, always opting for growth, willing to take the risk to see the reward, and quick to take action.

Promotion Focus people tend to have better and more consistent results than Prevention Focus people. You have a tendency toward one or the other but the good news is that it’s not born in you. It is something that has been learned, placed into your brain by the attitudes of people to whom you bonded, other people influential in your life, and combined with past experiences. So, if your tendency is towards the cautious, risk avoiding, and tentative nature of Prevention Focus, the good news is you can change. It is a matter of changing your mindset.

Start by imagining a change you wish to make or project you wish to start. List all the possible positive outcomes from successfully making that change or completing the project. Don’t downplay it, but also don’t go overboard. In most cases, you aren’t going to be a guest on The Ellen Degeneres Show because you completed a proposal package ahead of schedule for a client. But you will likely make a favorable impression on the client, which can lead to award of the project and potential future projects.

You may get referrals to other clients and generate a significant increase in business income and grow your business.
You may be able to hire staff and afford to take vacations.
You can build your reputation within the industry.
Your self-esteem goes up.

Imagine every possible positive outcome of making the change and WRITE IT DOWN! Then, every time you start feeling fearful, bring out the list and read it to yourself over and over again until you feel more in control.

Determine for yourself to Play to Win instead of Playing Not to Lose.

Action Plan

Take Dr. Halvorson’s FOCUS Diagnostic assessment to see whether you have a Prevention Focus or a Promotion Focus. Warning: be prepared to list about 12 attributes you would like to possess.
Think about one big thing you want to accomplish; it can be a current project or a dream, particularly if you have been feeling a lot of fear over it. Write down all the possible positive outcomes of accomplishing it and post it prominently. Set a start date.

Are You Wasting You? Finding Purpose in the Unique You

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Find the Unique Sweet Spot

How do you get to the point where you can truly embrace the weirdness, or uniqueness if you prefer, that is you? This is a real solid challenge. We know it is because you and I can look around us and see people who have no clue even that they are unique, let alone what that uniqueness is. It is demonstrated in the way they jump on the latest fad as if they were missing the bus. They line up for hours to buy the very latest iPhone or gadget, gotta wear the latest fashion, toss down the most recent popular drink, or try the latest adventure.

When I was in college I applied for a job as a bartender at a local bar. When I told the manager I had no formal training, he waved aside with his hand in the air, and simply told me

“read Playboy every month and learn the featured drinks. That’s what these guys are gonna come in and ask for if they don’t want a beer!“

That’s a great example of how the majority of people simply will allow themselves to be led around, told what to like, what to drink, what to feel, and what to do. But you and I don’t desire to be that way; if you did you would have quit reading this several minutes ago. So how do we escape the trap of being like everyone else and be who we really are? Even more to the point, how do we do it in such a way that we add value to others and make a living and a life doing it?

Unique Awareness

Being unique, being weird, requires a special awareness of yourself that most others don’t have. It means you need to spend time identifying and understanding your gifts, unlocking your passion behind them, and reflecting how to best use those gifts to add value to others. See, we are all born with gifts that were bestowed upon us to be used to provide something unique in this world; something that only we can do. That gift is designed to be used for a special purpose. There is at least one someone waiting for us to come along and share that gift with them to make a difference in the world. Some of us will directly influence a small number of people, maybe even one. Some, like Zig Ziglar, John Maxwell, or Tony Robbins may affect thousands or millions. The point isn’t how many but how you will influence them. So, identifying those gifts and learning to maximize them is the first step in preparing yourself to make that impact. That’s your purpose.

Applying Your Purpose

Once you have identified your gifts, it is imperative that you learn more about them and how to optimize them. You also need to learn the various ways in which your gifts can be used. The emphasis here needs to be on ways to use your gifts that benefit others. God did not give you a gift to use only on yourself; he blessed you so you can be a blessing to others. You must find that one way to use your gifts that allows you to provide maximum benefit. It will based, at least partially, on background and life experiences. We do not go through life randomly, even if we did not navigate it. Every job, every experience, no matter how unrelated, prepared us for that one way that we will have the most influence. Don’t de-value what you have done in the past just because it does not relate directly to what you want to do now. It was preparation. It was shaping you and molding you into what you are to become.

Now the real hard work begins. You have to do the work of actually applying it. You have to spend time EVERY DAY developing and honing those gifts. This is the start of a perpetual journey of growth. It never stops until you have reached the point of not being able to learn anything anymore. I mentioned in a previous post about Teddy Roosevelt that when he died they found under his pillow a self-improvement book he had been reading. Teddy knew that your entire life is a growth journey to challenge yourself to become more than you were yesterday.

Be a 1%er

That sounds overwhelming, but you can break it down into an easily manageable system. Focus simply on growing yourself by 1% a day. Committing yourself to being a 1%er means that over time you grow exponentially one day building on the next and at the end one year you have grown yourself OVER 365%! Remember that: become a 1%er.

No Weaknesses

And let’s make this a little easier: STOP WORKING ON YOUR WEAKNESSES. Conventional wisdom has always told us to identify our strengths and weaknesses and then work to improve our weaknesses. It is non-productive to focus on our weaknesses because if we work hard we can at best become mediocre at them; while at the same time we neglect our strengths and won’t prepared to get the most out of them. Focus instead on your strengths and your gifts. Overcome your weaknesses by finding others whose have strength where you are weak and team up with them to meet your goals.

The I in Team

That leads to the last point of this, which is what John Maxwell always reminds us of

One is too small a number to accomplish anything!

We are meant to be dependent upon others and work together to achieve great things. None of us is as smart as all of us. So while building upon your gifts you should also be building your team. Find people who have character you desire and are ready to buy into the vision of what you want to accomplish. Walk the path together and share the journey and share the treasures. Start it by being truly unique.

And remember, UNIQUE and UNITE both begin with UNI, meaning one. By developing your uniqueness and finding unique others, you can UNITE together to have a singular impact on this world.

A journey like that is worth starting today!

Follow your passion, not your pension – Denis Waitley

Action Plan

Start identifying your unique gifts. There are lots of tools to help you here. Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and DISC are a good start, but look to other less scientific tools as well, such as Stand-Out by Marcus Buckingham and StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath. I am also a big fan of the Fascination Advantage Test by Sally Hogshead. I have tried them all and find these three to highly accurate and consistent. You may have to purchase a book for the access code to some of these, but it is well worth it.
Think back to ways you have used those gifts in the past. Which times did you find yourself getting the greatest results? The greatest joy? When did you get lost in the moment while using your gifts? This will help you identify how you should use them.
Plan and schedule your daily growth of those gifts. Remember the 1%.