A Leader’s Gratitude Makes the Difference

Can we be thankful but not really grateful?

As we enter the Thanksgiving holiday here in America obviously the topic of gratitude comes up. Listening to my pastor on Sunday, he suggested in his talk that more often than not we are thankful for things but not grateful. Do you agree?

What I got from this was that thankfulness is a verbal expression but gratitude is an action.  In the story, Jesus rids ten men of Leprosy but only one comes back to show gratitude to Him.

Were they all thankful? Most certainly. Only one truly showed gratitude and that made the difference.

No Matter What

nighttime view of our cabin in georgiaIt’s been a weird month.  Lately, every month has been a weird month. I’m sure you can appreciate that as well.

My two youngest kids are about to complete their first semester of college. That’s a totally new feeling for me as I realize how close they are to striking out on their own.

We had a sudden need to go car shopping when one vehicle expired. Finding one that had the right features within our budget was a real struggle but we finally found one and completed the purchase. Just in time to drive it up to Georgia for a few days at my sister’s cabin. I am writing this from there.

Where is Your Focus as a Leader?

I mention this not to just to give you a family update but rather as an example. There were things that didn’t get done when I wanted them done because of these many distractions.

As a leader, I can put my focus on that OR I can focus on what went well.

  • I was thankful to find another car. My gratitude is the action of the stewardship I show in how I care for the vehicle and use it.
  • We are thankful our kids are in college. Our gratitude is to support them and encourage them in this experience.

As leaders, the actions we take in gratitude affect not only us but those we lead as well.

  • You can be thankful to be in business and in gratitude approach each day in a positive manner.
  • Thankful for the team you have and show gratitude by the way you treat them
  • Express thankfulness for the level of productivity your team has achieved and demonstrate gratitude by helping them to reach higher.
  • You can thank each customer for their business and show gratitude by rewarding them for their choice and their faithfulness.
  • Because you see despite all the disturbances in our week, the family was able to spend time together and to celebrate Thanksgiving and share a large, very filling meal.  Rather than harp on the inconveniences, we instead focus on the good and positive things that happened.

Gratitude is an action and therefore is one of a leader’s strongest tools.  Gratitude in practically the ultimate in positive thinking.  It doesn’t ignore the fact that there are problems. It doesn’t disregard that we are not where we wish to be or who we wish to be. It rejoices in what we have been blessed with so far, no matter how big or small.  And it turns that attitude into an action that creates more positive effect in both ourselves and our team.

[tweetthis]Gratitude is an action and a leader’s strongest tool. #gratitude[/tweetthis]

Gratitude is Out Loud

Gratitude, when properly practiced, becomes a way of life and a way of thinking.  The proper practice of gratitude is to engage in it daily.  Waiting until the holidays to express gratitude is not the appropriate application.  That’s called ritual.  What we want is authentic, heart-felt thankfulness for how your life has been blessed and how others have influenced you positively.  In fact, the key to effective gratitude is to remember that gratitude is loud and persistent.  The more often you promptly proclaim your thanksgiving and the more openly your share it, the more blessings multiply and opportunities appear and actions yield results.

[tweetthis]The key to effective gratitude is to remember that gratitude is loud and persistent. #gratitude[/tweetthis]

I am thankful I am here with family celebrating this season. My gratitude action is that I am stopping here to enjoy that. What will YOU do?

Action Plan

  • Start your own gratitude journal, beginning today and through to the rest of the year at least.  Each day, first thing in the morning (including weekends), write down ONE THING for which you are grateful.  From that, determine ONE ACTION YOU WILL TAKE to demonstrate your gratitude THAT DAY. Start now.

P.S.

Wow! After I finished and posted this, I ran across this excellent article supporting these thoughts. Give it a read.

Gratitude No Matter What

It’s been a weird week.  Holidays tend to get in the way of other things sometimes and we had a few things pop up to throw monkey wrenches into the works.  My Mother-in-Law had a little stint in the hospital this week and that required immediate attention and schedule adjustment.  On Thanksgiving Day I managed to put a deep cut on my hand that required 7 stitches at the Emergency Room and that also threw our schedule way off.  To be fair, I did get a blog post done as a guest on another blog (Linked2Leadership, see it here) but not much here.

I mention this not to excuse myself, but rather as a reflection.  Because you see despite all the disturbances in our week, the family was able to spend time together and to celebrate Thanksgiving and share a large, very filling meal.  Rather than harp on the inconveniences, we instead focus on the good and positive things that happened.

That’s what gratitude is all about.  Gratitude in practically the ultimate in positive thinking.  It doesn’t ignore the fact that there are problems, it doesn’t disregard that we are not where we wish to be or who we wish to be, it rejoices in what we have been blessed with so far, no matter how big or small.  That in turns gives us hope and leaves us open to possibilities.  It’s not turning a blind eye to our lack, it is opening our eyes to what is.

The Healing Power of Gratitude

Gratitude produces a healing power and, even more so, an almost miraculous circumstance of making better things happened.   Norman Vincent Peale discovered this in his own journey dealing with some very persistent issues in his life.  He observed

[snaptweet]In some unfathomable way, the acknowledgment of past blessings seems to be the activator of blessings.[/snaptweet]

When he focused on gratitude for how he was blessed in the past and blessed in the present, he found more blessings arriving his way.

Gratitude or Lack?

Too often, we have a lack mentality.  We focus too much on what we don’t have, what we haven’t accomplished, the traits we were shorted, the things we were denied.  The more we keep our minds fixed on what we don’t have, the more we tend to believe that not only do we not have it but we don’t deserve it.  We also close our minds to any circumstance around us that may provide an opportunity to change things.   We close things out and instead draw all of our focus strictly on what we lack.  We project into every other circumstance.  We can’t have, we can’t do, we can’t be because we lack money, because we lack skills, because we lack the right situation or timing or luck.  We then ignore opportunities, resources, and situations the present themselves to help us dig out of that pit.

There is the old story of a flood that hits a town.  One man, finding the water rising so high, climbs up on the roof of his house and prays to God to save him.  “Lord, please,” he says, ” just rescue me from this desperate situation!”  After a short-time, a neighbor comes by in a canoe and tells him, “I’ve got room!  Climb in and let’s get to safety!”  The man tells him, “No, I’m waiting for God to save me!”  The water continues to rise up the roof, almost covering it.  A woman comes along in boat and says, “Let me help you.  Get in and let’s go before the water gets much higher!”  The man says, “No, I am waiting for God to save me!”  Eventually, the water has covered the roof completely and is so high it is up to his knees.  A helicopter flies in overhead and a voice on a megaphone says, “I’ll lower a ladder!  You can climb up to safety!”  The man refuses, “God is going to save me!”  The water rises to his chest now and in desperation he cries out, “Lord, I asked you to save me!  Now I’m doomed!  All is lost!  Why haven’t you helped me?”  A voice booms out, “I sent you a canoe, a boat, and a helicopter.  What more do you want!”

Gratitude Out Loud

Gratitude, when properly practiced, becomes a way of life and a way of thinking.  Instead of lack mentality is promotes abundance mentality.  Some would call it pollyannaish.  I gladly accept that definition.  If you have ever seen the movie, Pollyanna DID make positive things happen around her.  What’s wrong with that?  The proper practice of gratitude is to engage in it daily.  Waiting until the holidays to express gratitude or waiting until one day a week in your church, temple, or mosque to express gratitude is not the appropriate application.  That’s called ritual.  What we want is authentic, heart-felt thankfulness for how your life has been blessed and how others have influenced you positively.  In fact, the key to effective gratitude is to remember that gratitude is loud and persistent.  The more often you promptly proclaim your thanksgiving and the more openly your share it, the more blessings multiply and opportunities appear and actions yield results.

[snaptweet]The key to effective gratitude is to remember that gratitude is loud and persistent.[/snaptweet]

The way many people accomplish this is by keeping a gratitude journal.  Use a notebook that your carry with you, or use a technology option like Evernote or Penzu, and each day (preferably first thing in the morning) record at least one thing for which you are thankful.  It has to be something different each day.  Do that for at least 30 days.  The first few days will be fairly easy but after that you will have to think about it more.  And that’s the idea; you want to spend more time discovering what really does exist in your life as a blessing.

The thing is, a gratitude journal is great for you, but I am a big believer in doing things that not only benefit you but provide value for others as well.  With that in mind, a few weeks ago I initiated the Gratitude Live Project.  Beginning earlier in November, I invited a select group to join me in the project up until Thanksgiving Day.  Each day, each participant would contact someone who had a positive influence in their life and thank them for it.  But it wasn’t enough to just say thank you, they had to be very specific about how and why that person influenced them positively.  The results were overwhelmingly positive!  Everyone found it not only made them more mindful of how others have influenced their life, but the recipients of the gratitude found felt better and more important; they felt like they made a difference!  Project members reported the revival and strengthening of relationships!  It went so well, I have decided to continue the project indefinitely, but modified out to a weekly instead of daily practice.

Just think, one small expression of gratitude making huge differences in people’s lives.  That’s how gratitude makes things happen!

Action Plan

  • Start your own gratitude journal, beginning today and through to the rest of the year at least.  Each day, first thing in the morning (including weekends), write down ONE THING for which you are grateful.  Note how your attitude changes and how your connections with others changes as well.
  • Join me in the Gratitude Live Project.  Make a difference in not just your life, but the lives of others as well.  There is no charge for this.  Click the link to begin.

Rejoice – Enjoying What We Have

We All Ride a Roller Coaster

I try to be transparent with what I share here.  The more you can see me, warts and all, then the more likely you are to realize that success in business and life is attainable; that we all have flaws, shortcomings, and challenges we face.  Steve Jobs, despite his incredible vision and gift for marketing, had big character flaws.  Same with Bill Gates, and many others.  Ray and Maurice McDonald didn’t have the vision to make their restaurant a household name; it took Ray Kroc to do that.  We ALL have hurdles to face and have up times and down times.

I share that because recently I have been having a down time.  For a variety of reasons, things have not gone well in different parts of my life and I have gotten down on myself and doubts began to creep in.  When that happens for me, I go back and look for things that remind me to re-focus and think positive.

Warning:  The rest of this post will have a decidedly spiritual bent to it.  I apologize if it offends you; I do not apologize for who I am and what I believe.

REJOICEI ran across this:  I have a card I received at a men’s group meeting years ago that I keep around. It is shaped like a stop sign and, in fact, on one side looks like a stop sign.  On the other it carries this verse from the Bible, specifically from Philippians 4:4-7:

“Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS (emphasis mine)!  I say again, REJOICE!  Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

Changes in Attitude

For me, of course, it is a reminder of where I have put my faith and my life.  It is also a reminder that no matter what else I have things I can take great joy in throughout my life daily.

Let’s expand it beyond and see what we can find for everyone.  When we have an ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE, we are better able to keep things in perspective.  When we rejoice in the things we have that cannot be taken away, that the world cannot touch, then we provide a solid base for how we regard everything else that happens in our life.  Once we have that perspective and are thinking in gratitude, therefore thinking positively, then we are better equipped to handle the crisis and not only survive but come out ahead.  Zig Ziglar often said

“The more you express gratitude for what you have the more you will have to express gratitude for.”

gratitude - thank youAdopting the principle of rejoicing yields big returns; perhaps not always in the way we expect.  Certainly, we all wish we had more money, more resources, more opportunities, more clients, more of whatever is on our mind right now.  Yet when we rejoice in what we do have, we see that not only do we have a full cup but that it actually overflows.  On the other hand, when we focus on what we don’t have we can lose what we do have.   I remember years ago watching a comedy sketch where a man asks another man who is holding a cup of coffee for the time.  The second man turns his wrist to look at his watch and pours out his cup of coffee.  Like the man, we lose focus on what’s in our hand to look at something else.

Consider This

What would your life be like if, for say at least a week, when someone asks you how you are you respond with “I am rejoicing!”  Don’t reflect on what people will think about you, center on what it will do for you.  Certainly it would be hard to say that continually and be negative.

I am going to try that for the next two weeks.  I invite you to try it with me and let me know how it goes.

Action Plan:

  • Begin a gratitude journal.  Get a notepad or journal or use an online one like Penzu.  Every day for at least a month, write down at least one thing you are grateful for.  Each day you have to enter something you have not previously added; in other words, each day is unique.  Look at the list often.
  • Respond to any greeting of “how are you” with “I am rejoicing!” for at least a week.  If someone asks you why, use the gratitude reason of the day or some other response if you wish.

I welcome your thoughts here about the ideas shared in today’s post!