The Lie of Experience as the Best Teacher

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Experience Happens

You have probably heard it said hundreds if not thousands of times during your life.

Experience is the best teacher.

Every day, from the moment you rise until you put your head on the pillow, you are going through a series of experiences. Some experiences are what we would call good; nice things happen, we feel happy about it. Others….not so much.

See the Ah-Ha! Moment of the Week on this topic.

Mistakes are painful when they happen, but years later a
collection of mistakes is what is called experience.
-Denis Waitley

Here’s the thing: if every day we ALL have experiences then why is it that most of us don’t get any smarter?

More Than Experience

If experience were truly the best teacher, then would it not logically follow that each of us would be getting smarter every day and would never repeat the same mistakes because our experience would have taught us better? Is that what happens in your life? Is that what happens around you? You know what I am talking about, the people who keep making the same mistake they made yesterday and the day before, getting the same results, and not getting that it ain’t gonna work that way. Why? If experience is the best teacher, then they should have already learned not to do that again.

I have to admit to being hardheaded this way sometimes. I’ll do the same dumb thing over and over again, somehow expecting different results. I might rationalize it, excuse it, or simply learn the wrong lesson from previous experience. I’m not an idiot, I am a fairly bright guy. Why isn’t experience teaching me anything?

Experience Plus

The truth is that experience alone is no kind of teacher at all. It is REFLECTIVE EXPERIENCE that really makes the difference. It is how we analyze what we experience that allows us to draw the appropriate conclusions and lessons from what happens to us and engage in positive behaviors to prevent it from happening again. That reflection needs to be timely; it needs to happen within a short period of time after the experience. It should not be rushed. The best approach is usually to spend a little time at the end of the day thinking about what good things happened, what not so good things happened, and examining them. Ask questions about each experience:

What was good (or not so good) about it?
Who was involved?
What was the outcome?
Was that the outcome I anticipated?
What would have been a better or ideal outcome?
Why did it happen that way?
What can I do differently to change the outcome?
How can I use this to add value to someone else?

Experience as an Even BETTER Teacher

The last question leads to the last point. As the Denis Waitley quote said above, mistakes are painful. So even if we are learning from our mistakes, we still have to go through the pain. Just a show of hands out there, who likes to go through pain?

Yeah, didn’t think so.

So how can we avoid the pain? Simply by learning from others experience. In fact, I believe that other people’s experience can be absolutely the best teacher for us. Examining the experiences of others allows us to be more evaluative about it because our minds are not clouded by emotion or pain. We can assess the decisions, the process, and the outcomes and attempt to come up with practical applications to help prevent it from occurring in OUR lives.

One of the best ways to allow people to share stories with you. Stories allow experiences to be personalized; we connect with them better and connect with the people involved. Reading the biographies (and autobiographies) of people we admire also is an excellent way to do this. If they have any level of transparency, they will readily share their mistakes in their stories and we can derive great lessons from people we know to be accomplished persons.

Action Plan:

How are you going to implement regular reflection on your experiences?
Pick at least two people that you want to learn from this month. Get books about them, publications, web sites about them, or just sit down over coffee (or drinks) and talk to them. Make notes on what you learn

How to Rejoice Always

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Rejoice – Enjoying What We Have

We All Ride a Roller Coaster

I try to be transparent with what I share here. The more you can see me, warts and all, then the more likely you are to realize that success in business and life is attainable; that we all have flaws, shortcomings, and challenges we face. Steve Jobs, despite his incredible vision and gift for marketing, had big character flaws. Same with Bill Gates, and many others. Ray and Maurice McDonald didn’t have the vision to make their restaurant a household name; it took Ray Kroc to do that. We ALL have hurdles to face and have up times and down times.

I share that because recently I have been having a down time. For a variety of reasons, things have not gone well in different parts of my life and I have gotten down on myself and doubts began to creep in. When that happens for me, I go back and look for things that remind me to re-focus and think positive.

Warning: The rest of this post will have a decidedly spiritual bent to it. I apologize if it offends you; I do not apologize for who I am and what I believe.

I ran across this: I have a card I received at a men’s group meeting years ago that I keep around. It is shaped like a stop sign and, in fact, on one side looks like a stop sign. On the other it carries this verse from the Bible, specifically from Philippians 4:4-7:

“Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS (emphasis mine)! I say again, REJOICE! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

Changes in Attitude

For me, of course, it is a reminder of where I have put my faith and my life. It is also a reminder that no matter what else I have things I can take great joy in throughout my life daily.

Let’s expand it beyond and see what we can find for everyone. When we have an ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE, we are better able to keep things in perspective. When we rejoice in the things we have that cannot be taken away, that the world cannot touch, then we provide a solid base for how we regard everything else that happens in our life. Once we have that perspective and are thinking in gratitude, therefore thinking positively, then we are better equipped to handle the crisis and not only survive but come out ahead. Zig Ziglar often said

“The more you express gratitude for what you have the more you will have to express gratitude for.”

Adopting the principle of rejoicing yields big returns; perhaps not always in the way we expect. Certainly, we all wish we had more money, more resources, more opportunities, more clients, more of whatever is on our mind right now. Yet when we rejoice in what we do have, we see that not only do we have a full cup but that it actually overflows. On the other hand, when we focus on what we don’t have we can lose what we do have. I remember years ago watching a comedy sketch where a man asks another man who is holding a cup of coffee for the time. The second man turns his wrist to look at his watch and pours out his cup of coffee. Like the man, we lose focus on what’s in our hand to look at something else.

Consider This

What would your life be like if, for say at least a week, when someone asks you how you are you respond with “I am rejoicing!” Don’t reflect on what people will think about you, center on what it will do for you. Certainly it would be hard to say that continually and be negative.

I am going to try that for the next two weeks. I invite you to try it with me and let me know how it goes.

Action Plan:

Begin a gratitude journal. Get a notepad or journal or use an online one like Penzu. Every day for at least a month, write down at least one thing you are grateful for. Each day you have to enter something you have not previously added; in other words, each day is unique. Look at the list often.
Respond to any greeting of “how are you” with “I am rejoicing!” for at least a week. If someone asks you why, use the gratitude reason of the day or some other response if you wish.

I welcome your thoughts here about the ideas shared in today’s post!

Why Aren’t Your Employees Loyal?

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Loyalty Is…..

Loyalty Generations

loyalty - Boy Scout

Technically, I am a Baby Boomer, although I am right near the end of that generation and in some ways identify with Generation X‘ers as well. So call me a Boomer X. I mention that because early on, Baby Boomers were taught what the previous generation shared with them in terms of work and loyalty. You left school, went to work for a company and stayed with them your entire career (at their discretion). Very rarely did you have any control over what role you filled, whether or how you advanced, how you grew, when you retired, etc. You were expected to be loyal to the company at all costs. Very rarely was that loyalty returned. Some organizations rewarded loyalty by returning loyalty to their people, but most focused on punishing disloyalty and showing very little appreciation for those who were loyal. One of the reasons I identify with Generation X as well as the Boomers is that Generation X started to reject that. Generation Y and Millenials even more so.

This topic is also covered in the Ah-Ha! Moment of the Week!

Changing Loyalty Landscape

The landscape of what loyalty means in the business world has changed. Most people don’t stay with an organization more than about five years before they move on. You can attribute that to poor work ethic if you wish, or lack of loyalty; but the reality is simply that today’s worker refuses to buy into the one-way street of loyalty. They expect loyalty to be a two-way street. If they are loyal to the company they expect some loyalty in return. Since as a manager or business owner you will almost inevitably have to hire at least some people from Gen Y, you must change your thinking to follow that theme. Change your focus on what you expect out of loyalty. You have to be willing to commit resources to help somebody become better at what they do with the knowledge that they most likely will be with you forever and may eventually take what they have learned from you and go somewhere new. That’s the gamble of investing in people, but the alternative is a bigger gamble with consequences even more significant if you lose (and you will). So think in terms of how you can maximize your investment over the short term and long term. If you can get somebody up to speed, maximize what they can produce for you, and maximize their potential over the time period they are with you, then it’s a win-win.

Encouraging Loyalty

So here’s some tips to help you along.

Focus on Relationships — Building relationships with your employees. Understand their desires, understand their dreams so you can help them move towards that. Remember the three questions you must answer for them are do you care for me, can you help me, and can I trust you.
Focus on Growth — Invest in your employees with formal training, modeling, mentoring, and providing them with challenges to push them out of their comfort zone. The more you can help them and move them closer to their potential, the better they are going to produce for you.
Focus on Empowerment — Equip them and authorize them to take the steps they need to take to produce for you.
Focus on Communication — Communicating with them at all times. ALL TIMES!
Focus on NOW — Forget about forever. Work on building loyalty for the time they are with you, allowing them to give you the best return while you are giving the best to them.

Here’s the Bonus

When you invest in your employees and give them time, resources, training, caring, and influence – show them loyalty – then many of them will be loyal in return. Not all of them, maybe not even most of them. But the ones who count. Remember you are looking for the golden ones anyway; the ones who will yield greatest returns for you. You are mining for gold. As Dale Carnegie says,

“Developing your people is a lot like mining for gold. You have to move a lot of dirt to get to the gold. But you don’t go looking for the dirt, you go looking for the gold.”

Your Action

What will you do today to begin looking for the gold?
How can you best invest in your employees for the short and long term?
What are you willing to give up to reach that?

Dream Your Way to Productivity

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Daily Productivity

Wave a stick around and you are bound to hit a pinata full of productivity tips somewhere on the web. Everyone has their special tips on how to make your day more productive as an entrepreneur or small business executive or simply as a worker bee. Some of them are quite good. I am especially a fan of Helen Raptoplous (also called Helen Rappy). She provides practical, easy to apply steps to manage your day more effectively and increase your productivity. When you can get more out of yourself in a day, whether working for yourself or someone else, you will be more be productive. You will achieve. You will get noticed. And you will be in demand as a result.

Dream to the Next Level

Dreams — http://www.dreamstime.com/future-look-stock-photography-imagefree90202

It’s been my experience that the ones who are most productive are driven; and they are almost always driven by a dream. They have a vision of who they want to be, what they want to do, how they want to add value to others.

When you feel that you have something special you can offer people in this world and it can make a difference in their lives and yours, you are more inclined to look for ways to be more effective about it.

No doubt about it, living your dream creates a new world with new possibilities and leads to to find out how to best share it with others.

That’s not to say that the dream alone is sufficient. You still must focus on daily growth, learning more about what you do and how you do it. You must learn to be intentionally productive. Many times we are “accidental achievers”; things get accomplished and we are not exactly sure how. What we want is to not only achieve our desired results, we want to know how we got there so we can repeat it.

Start that Dream

So, if the best way you can be highly productive is to work to realize your dream, then take a look at what you are doing today. Ask yourself these questions:

What am I doing, small or large, to work towards my dream?
What one thing, my 1%, can I use to grow today?
What will I do tomorrow to build on that?

Why Your Work and Your Mindset About Work Matters

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Work and Motivation

“It is the working man who is the happy man. It is the idle man who is miserable.” –Benjamin Franklin

It’s a sometimes popular thing to complain about how much work we have to do. Or the type of work we have to do. Or even the fact we have to do work

at all. “Man, I got so much work to do, I don’t know when I’ll ever finish!” “Wow, I’ll sure be glad when the work is done!” We have the wrong attitude about work and it can be hazardous to our employment outlook and our mental health.

Made to Work

The truth is that we were designed for work. Our bodies, our minds, everything about us is designed to toil and sometimes sweat. Some work with their hands, some with their heads, some with both. However we work, we were created for it. Work benefits us as much as we provide benefit through the work we do.

And the type of work doesn’t matter. Someone who labors at farming or construction or janitorial services provides obvious benefits to their people or organizations they serve. So does someone who manages those functions, or even consults with leaders to help them get better results. The key is to recognize that someone is benefiting from the work you do. I am reminded of a TED Talk from Mike Rowe (Dirty Jobs and an Eagle Scout) a few years ago. In it, he talked about some of the dirtiest jobs he shadowed and participated in. The common thread he saw was that the people doing that work were almost always happy. They went about their job whistling and went home tired but content. (view about 10 minutes in).

Work Benefits Us

Work provides benefits beyond the paycheck. Beyond what we earn, work benefits us by

Providing a sense of purpose and self-worth
An avenue for creative expression of ourselves
Focus on others
Development of social skills and contacts
Development of new skills
Opportunity to direct our giftedness to the benefit of others

I realize that not all those benefits are provided to everyone in every job; but that’s more a factor of the job chosen than the job itself. Or perhaps even more to the point, it’s a factor of choosing NOT to find the benefits rather than the benefits not existing.

But overall, the function of where we spend at least 40 hours of our 168 hours in a week (roughly 25%), should and potentially can provide benefits that extend past the printed slip of paper (or direct deposit) we receive regularly.

It helps make us what we are and shapes our identity.

Work Crisis

The challenge we face in a time of high unemployment is that for many it takes this potential fulfillment away. We have young adults fresh out of college with all the ambition and even arrogance that comes with being a college graduate who quickly lose heart when they find that the perfect job is not sitting on the other side of dais waiting for them. We have people 50 and over who lose jobs because of cutbacks who are deemed unemployable because of age discrimination. All have something of value to give, yet do not have a place to share that.

The result is that frustration builds, malaise sets in, and even the most powerful speech by Tony Robbins or Zig Ziglar can make an impact.

Forget the Economy. The only saving grace for it is that we have to get people back to making a contribution, whether they are 25, 55, or 75. When we are making a contribution, our self-esteem rises, our confidence surges. When we are confident, we are more likely to spend. Consumer spending boosts the economy. A rising economy benefits everyone.

Did we just solve our problem?

P.S. If you are one of those jobless in the economy, don’t let yourself sink into the abyss of self-pity and discouragement. Take at least some of your time each week as you search for employment volunteering in your community. The social relationships developed and the opportunity to express yourself will keep your spirits up for campaign, while providing a sense of contribution to your community. I know, it can seem like you are wasting time you should be spending looking for a job, but in the long run it will give your a better outlook and more positive attitude so you can make a better impact in that interview. And it shows you are a person who gets things done and doesn’t just sit around idle.

How You Lead Today Determines How Your Team Succeeds Tomorrow!

The Lie of Experience as the Best Teacher

Experience Happens

Experience is the best teacher.

See the Ah-Ha! Moment of the Week on this topic.

Mistakes are painful when they happen, but years later a
collection of mistakes is what is called experience.
-Denis Waitley