I
like the title here; not only because it is somewhat catchy, but also because this week Sherry and I celebrated 18 years of marriage. She has been a tremendous blessing in my life and has believed in me even when I have not always believed in myself (yes, it happens to everyone). So, certainly a kiss has been on my mind.
It’s also an acronym, of course, for Keep It Simple, Silly, the admonition originating with either the Navy or Lockheed’s Skunkworks depending on who you believe. It’s a reminder for me at least that in the midst of complexity I need to fall back on simplicity. Especially when I communicate, I need to keep it simple. As a speaker, there is a tendency to want to create complex, intricate phrases and flowery statements because it is important that we sound like we know what we are talking about. But my objective isn’t to boost my reputation, it’s to communicate something I believe is important enough to share. Therefore, I need to keep my message simple.
I have been participating in a discussion on LinkedIn with other professional speakers about whether you should memorize your speech and just get the main points down in a outline and speak off the cuff. Naturally, it is a polarizing topic for those who care about those kinds of details. The pro-memorize people believe it helps you sound more professional and polished. The pro-outline people believe it makes you sound less rehearsed and you speak more from the heart.
For me, I have a hard time writing it down unless it comes from my heart. And I can’t possibly do an outline, it’s just not the way I think. And I think it misses the point. The point is to communicate with your audience; not just spew information, but communicate. To communicate, you have to first connect with the person or audience to whom you are speaking. Without that connection, your words fall basically on deaf ears. You may get nods of acknowledgement, but you won’t get action and you certainly won’t get any commitment. And this is true whether it is a speech before a large audience, addressing a board of directors, one-on-one with an employee or boss, or speaking to your best friend or your spouse or child.
Here’s the thing: no one connects precisely the same way as someone else. And this is where the discussion on LinkedIn goes awry. For some, the only way they can have the opportunity to effectively connect with someone is if they feel secure in the words and expression and may only get that from memorization and rehearsal. Others may feel uncomfortable delivering by rote and if you are uncomfortable then there is no way you can make anyone else comfortable; therefore you won’t make a connection. So those people work best by speaking from the heart, letting the words flow as they may. So the point is don’t worry about choosing this way or that way; let your mind and heart get together and create the flow. And don’t forget the most critical way you communicate: LISTEN!